My Spot

Everyone knows that when being petted, I prefer sitting on the left side of the person while Asa sits on the right.  However, Asa has a hard time remembering this unwritten rule, and I am forced to remind him on a daily basis.  Every evening it is the same routine.  While Mom tidies up in the kitchen, Dad settles in on our dog bed to watch TV.  Being a thoughtful dog, I will help Mom with the dinner clean up by searching for crumbs on the floor.  As the saying goes though, “no good deed goes unpunished.”  My eagerness to help inevitably means when I go to join Dad, Asa is in my spot on the floor next to him.  Occasionally a gentle nudge works in getting him out of my way.  More often than not though, some “Golden strategery” is necessary.

Now when nudging doesn’t work, another method I like to use is distraction.  I know Asa cannot resist going outside.  He is always optimistic that a spontaneous game of fetch may happen.  Therefore to remove Asa from my spot, I will simply pretend that I need to go out.  When Mom finally finishes cleaning and joins us in the living room, I will alert her to my desires.  Without hesitation, she’ll get up and head to the door with Asa happily following her.  That’s when I assume my rightful place on the left side of Dad to be petted.

Ok, I admit Mom is catching onto this trick, and occasionally refuses to take Asa out for me.  In this situation I will sit next to Mom and let her pet me in an effort to make Asa jealous.  To get Asa’s attention and lure him away from Dad, I will exaggerate my moves to show him how awesome Mom is at petting me.  I will wag my tail in ecstasy, or tilt my head and close my eyes with the look of absolute pleasure on my face.  Alright I admit it, it’s not an act.  I really do enjoy it when Mom pets me.  Problem is, Mom tends to sit in a chair and not on the floor, forcing me to sit or stand when I’d rather be laying down.  I’ve had a long day too, you know.  I want to unwind and rest.

So if all else fails and Asa isn’t lured away from my spot at Dad’s side, that’s when I have no choice but to use my go to move of the pitiful moan.  I will lay just out of arm’s reach from Mom, look as pathetic as possible, and periodically make a heart wrenching moaning wail.  I’m not proud of this move, but desperate times call for desperate measures.  If Mom tries to ignore it, I will thump my tail once on the floor for added emphasis.  Usually one of two things will happen here.  Either Mom will give in and sit on the floor to pet me.  Or my cries of distress this will get Asa’s attention, and he will come over to check on his poor brother.  If Asa’s comes over, that’s when I will jump up and take my spot in my rightful place on the dog bed next to Dad!  Asa, who really doesn’t mind where, when, who or how he is petted, will then settle in next to Mom and we all can finally enjoy watching TV together.

This brings me to the point of today’s blog.  The other night Asa completely ignored all the rules.  As soon as I was in my preferred spot, he opted to stand on top of me!  So I added a new move to my bag of tricks.  I wrestled Asa out of the way!  Reminding me that a direct approach is best after all, despite Mom and Dad reprimanding me to stop wrestling my little brother.  Oh and in case you’re wondering, no, sitting on the right side of Dad isn’t a possibility.  I have high standards you know!

See what I have to put up with? Asa, MOVE!


About the author

Chuck Billy is a Golden Retriever, living in Southern Maine, who likes to share his unique observations on life with his little brother Asa. When not writing his blog, he spends his days being awesome.

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