Did you hear that noise? The Great Squirrel must be up to his tricks again. What’s this? You don’t believe in the Great Squirrel! I’ve seen him myself! Gather round, and I’ll tell you the tale.

It was a cold autumn twilight. I was taking my Dad for one last walk on the lonely country road, before settling in next to the warmth of the hearth. As the darkness closed in around us, I couldn’t help but feel we weren’t alone. That’s when it happened!

The trees began to rain acorns down on us! Could it be the wind? Nonsense! It was too still. Onward we walked. Rattled, but undeterred. What’s that sound? Even Dad turned to peer into the underbrush, just in time to see a dark shape dart past. Our pace quickened towards home.

Then from the shadows I could hear the distinctive whirring sound of a squirrel spinning without care on the neighbor’s bird feeder. Before I could react, another began to taunt me with the most maniacal chattering from a nearby fencepost. Realizing I was outnumbered, we retreated down our driveway. What emboldened these menaces to dogs? Why aren’t they running in fear?

That’s when I looked up and saw the Great Squirrel tiptoeing across my rooftop! The Great Squirrel had summoned his minions! No dog is safe when the Great Squirrel is around! He rallies squirrels to act with reckless abandon taunting dogs, but yet protects them so they remain unscathed!

Heed my warning this October! The next time you are home and see a squirrel peering into the window at you, don’t react! That is what they want! To lure you outside, and play their wicked games at your expense! If you’re outside, don’t chase! For who knows what lies in wait when the Great Squirrel is lurking! But if you are brave, very brave indeed, and quiet as a country road at twilight, you just may get to see the Great Squirrel!