Move over werewolves, vampires, zombies, demonic cats, and creepy clowns, it’s time that Maine’s monster of the ocean deep gets featured in its own horror movie! I’m talking about none other than the lobster! Now before you go licking your chops dreaming of this Maine delicacy, you may have second thoughts after reading these shell shocking facts, that are stranger than science fiction!
Whereas most horror movie monsters have menacing smiles with sharp teeth, lobsters do not. Instead they chew with their stomachs! They have a unique structure called the gastric mill located right behind their eyes, that is approximately the size of a walnut. The gastric mill has three grinding surfaces that break down its prey as it enters the stomach. This somewhat makes those menacing clowns with the pointy teeth seem downright friendly!
If that isn’t weird enough, werewolves may be a lot hairier, but lobsters use the chemosensory hair on their legs and feet to identify their next meal. These sensory hairs work very similar to our tongues, allowing lobsters to distinguish tastes in their environment. Combine that with their antennae’s ability to smell, and scientists have found that lobsters can pinpoint the food they want right down to a single amino acid. Not even a zombie’s appetite is that precise!
Lobsters also use their ability to taste with their legs to detect and avoid things. So don’t even think of trying to sneak up on one! Besides, they may look like they can only creep along moving forward, but if you startle one they can fold their legs and claws against their bodies and rocket backwards by curling and uncurling its tail. This allows it to keep track of the predator or threat in front of it while escaping! So when starring in a horror movie, lobsters can do their own stunts in dramatic chase scenes!
However, like all good horror movie monsters, they will fight back if necessary! Their claws can exert pressure of up to 100 pounds per square inch. Scientists have discovered they will use one claw as a crusher and the other as a ripper, causing significant damage to its prey and enemies. They’ve even been known to remove the fingers of foolhardy lobstermen, who don’t show them the proper respect. Therefore, I don’t suggest picking a fight with one, despite their comparatively smaller size.
More frightening is if they should lose one of these claws, they can grow a new one! Ok, so it isn’t immediate and takes approximately 5 years to regenerate a new claw the size of the old one. But the fact they can regenerate body parts is really unnerving! Not only that, but these monsters of the ocean floor will cut off their own limb if it gets stuck, to prevent themselves from being trapped and starving. Now I know what you’re thinking, “What’s the big deal? Ash in Evil Dead 2 cut off his demonic possessed hand.” Indeed, he did, but he never grew a new one to replace it!
However, the scariest fact about these monsters of the deep is that in ideal conditions lobsters can achieve immortality! Take that Highlander, Duncan MacLeod of the Clan MacLeod! Seriously, scientists have no idea how long a lobster can live. As lobsters get older, they show no signs of aging. Older lobsters continue to have a voracious appetite and high energy, as well as reproduce. Because of their ability to molt their shells, scientists are also unsure of how big lobsters can actually grow! Unlike most monsters who are eventually limited by their skeletons, the possibilities for lobsters are endless! Experts at the Lobster Institute at the University of Maine theorize, “lobsters can grow to be four feet long, 40 pounds, and maybe 100 years old!”
So in summary, if Stephen King, John Carpenter, or Sam Raimi happen to read this post, isn’t it about time you show Maine lobsters the respect they deserve and feature them in one of your scary novels or horror movies?
