Beware my superstitious friends, today is Friday the 13th, and not just any Friday the 13th.  Today is the ONLY Friday the 13th for all of 2016, AND it falls during May which is Zombie Awareness Month!  Coincidence?  I think not!  Obviously Zombies will be more active today.  But before you panic, there is hope that you will survive!  Let me share with you my own harrowing journey through the Zombie Apocalypse.

It all began in January 2015, when Mom and Dad accidentally brought home a Zombie!  How could they be so careless?  I knew right away based on its awkward gait, razor sharp teeth, and insatiable desire to gnaw on flesh that it was a Zombie!  That fateful winter I was trapped inside for months with this menacing creature, trying to avoid its constant chewing.  But to no avail.  Knowing that Zombies are attracted to the slightest movement, I tried to lay motionless for what seemed like an eternity.  Only to have my whereabouts revealed by the slightest breath or twitch.  Upon noticing me, the demon would immediately pounce and start biting me.  It was torture!  Time and time again I found myself at the mercy of its excruciating pointy teeth.  Luckily it was pure willpower that protected me from turning into a Zombie myself.  Well that and my thick fur, in which Mom sometimes found the Zombie’s tiny teeth embedded.

However, it is a little known fact that Zombies can be rehabilitated.  It wasn’t easy, but after months of constant reinforcement I finally convinced the demon that it wasn’t polite to chomp on unsuspecting victims, and that he’d receive a more positive response if he just greeted friends with a tail wag.  Wait, what do you mean Zombies don’t have tails?  Zombies Puppies do!  Who is this Zombie Puppy that I rehabilitated to be a well-adjusted member of society, you ask?  Why Asa, of course!  Who else did you think I was talking about?

This has been a Friday the 13th Zombie Awareness Month Public Service Announcement from Living with a Golden.