Once again I begin this post by telling everyone not to worry.  I’m ok.  In fact, I’m more than ok, I’m great!  Asa took our little conversation to heart, and is finally helping me while I wear this ridiculous cone of shame.  He even went above and beyond by showing impressive problem solving skills.  The cone of shame is preventing me from licking my wound as it heals.  Oh man, does it get itchy some days!  But it never occurred to me that Asa could help by doing it for me!  Clearly my little brother is a genius.  So it is rather surprising that Mom and Dad don’t appreciate his efforts.

Mom and Dad kept finding the spot irritated and blamed me.  I know in the past I’ve managed to escape from the cone of shame on several occasions, and even ate it once.  But I’m older and wiser now, and a bit insulted that they would think so lowly of me.  Well no matter, it didn’t take long for Asa to show them how he is helping me.  But rather than praise him for his ingenuity, Mom and Dad insulted us both by repeatedly saying, “leave it!”  I’m not sure who is more insulted.  Me for being reduced to an “it,” or Asa for being reprimanded for helping me.  Either way, neither one of us expected what happened next.  Would you believe they decided to separate us?

Now here is where my problem solving skills are vastly superior than theirs.  If the purpose of the cone is to prevent touching the wound, clearly they are missing the obvious solution.  Take the cone of shame off me and put it on Asa!  It would prevent him from going near me, and to be honest my goofy little brother actually enjoys wearing it.  So we’re all happy!  Oh sure it would require me to avoid the temptation of scratching, but I’ll just cross that bridge when I get to it.  But alas, no one listens to me.  So I’m spending the day with Dad, while Asa is with Mom.  I’m proud to say though that Asa really did listen to my lecture, and is downstairs helping Mom clean.  Based on the thumps, bangs, and Mom repeatedly saying, “No Asa…leave it…drop it,” he’s showing her more efficient ways of doing things.  Who would have guessed that behind that goofy exterior is the mind of a genius!