Asa’s birthday celebration made me nostalgic.  Tomorrow would have been my big brother Lemmy’s 10th birthday.  It was on his 5th birthday that my coming was foretold, so I’m not sure what he is complaining about in this email to his mother?  Ok, I do agree playing pin the tail on the Golden was a mean trick, and Asa’s gifts were a lot better than what Lemmy received.  However, some traditions continue.  Lemmy would be amused to know that Mom and Dad still insist on getting birthday cakes with our names and not sharing them with us.  I bet tomorrow Lemmy is going to eat the biggest and best birthday cake ever and share it with Momma Butter and Grandpa…maybe even our kitty cousin Misty will get a slice too!  Happy Birthday Lemmy!  We miss you!

November 29, 2011

Dear Momma Butter,

Never trust a cat.  Cousin Misty’s idea of cool gifts were totally disappointing!  All I got for my birthday was a new bed, blanket, collar and a scary squeaky toy.  What 5 year old wants that?  My party was also a big let down.  Misty hung the pin the tail on the donkey too high for me to play, but I’m pretty sure she taped my picture over the donkey’s face!  Adding insult to injury, at one point during the game someone pinned a tail on me!  Oh and don’t get me started about my cake.  I had to pose for pictures with it, but they wouldn’t let me have any even though MY NAME was clearly on it!

Making matters worse, I read Mom and Dad’s emails, and they are looking to get me a sibling!  Not sure when or if they were planning to seek my input on the whole matter.  I’m going to intercept their emails and tell the breeder how neglected I am.  I got a bed for my birthday!  Who does that to a dog?

Love,

Lemmy

Dearest One,

I was thinking that I might come down for a visit, but after seeing your birthday photos I’m afraid I might be dressed up in some strange outfit.  You, of course, look darling, but me at my age with an image to maintain must not allow myself to be lighthearted.  I consider myself in the vanguard of propriety, and now that Emily Post is no longer with us I do my best to influence from behind the curtain of respectable decorum.

As for the new sibling, it might divert your parents’ attention from dressing you in silly outfits and taking funny photos.  Their intentions could instead be focused on a new puppy.  You in turn could do what I’ve tried to do, be a parental figure for some unfortunate pup in need of a home.

My Love,

Momma Butter