According to my calendar today is “Puppy Day.”  So without further ado I’m turning over today’s post to our resident puppy, Asa.

Today I would like to address the abhorrent double standards I see within our pack.  Yes, I am aware of the pack hierarchy: Dad is alpha, Mom is omega, and myself and Chuck Billy fall in between.  So why is it Mom and Dad are allowed to do certain things, while Chuck Billy and myself cannot?  Case in point, sitting on the couch.  You do not see us complaining when you sit on our dog beds with us, so why is it such a big deal when I try to sit on the couch with you?  Clearly if we are to function as a pack we should not exclude members from bonding over a nice bowl of popcorn while snuggling on the couch.

This brings me to my next point, food.  Don’t think I haven’t noticed that after hunting at someplace you call the grocery store, Dad and Mom consume food that we are not privilege to eat as well.  Although you’ve never asked, if I had to I might consider sharing my delicious puppy kibble with you.  So it just doesn’t seem fair that you do not give us the same courtesy of sharing because some of those smells are quite intriguing.

And finally speaking of smell, I know your dirty little secret!  You go to the bathroom in the house!  Why am I relegated to going outside on cold blustery days, when I can clearly smell what you do in that small room with the large fancy looking water bowl?  Ok, I think this habit of yours is actually rather gross because it is next to the kitchen where we eat, but for the sake of curiosity why is it fine for you and not for us?

I suppose I’m not the first puppy to ponder such things, nor will I be the last.  Chuck Billy just says it is the way of things and accepts it, but I may try to push some of these boundaries.  Opps I hear Mom coming, I better get off the couch!  Happy Puppy Day!