Neighborhood patrol is inherently dangerous work. During the 7 years that I’ve been fulfilling my duties, I’ve been trailed by coyotes, mocked by squirrels, and recently ambushed by a bird with a fly by pooping. Yet through it all I have managed to stay focused on the task, and complete my duties to the best of my abilities. That is until this morning, when I had no choice but to retreat!

It was a relatively calm morning. The air was crisp, but promising for a pleasant day ahead. The sun was just waking up and ready to take on the day. The commuters were driving by waving at us. All seemed right in our neighborhood. That’s when the first miscreant appeared out of nowhere, and warned me of the impending attack.

However, before I could process what was happening, we were surrounded by a bloodthirsty mob of mosquitoes! Dad began wildly flailing his arms trying to defend himself from these formidable foes. Mom bravely tried to protect my snout from the mosquitoes who were now using it as a staging area to carry out their devious plot. Asa, oblivious as usual, thought this was some sort of new game and jumped around in glee unaware that he could be drained of all his blood at any moment.

It was at this moment Dad turned and could see in the sun’s reflection that a huge swarm had surrounded us. “RUN!” he yelled. “We’re surrounded!” And with that we retreated to the safety of our home. Unfortunately though several winged intruders followed us inside the house. So Mom is now frantically swatting at these home invaders. Dad is counting the bites he received. I believe he’s up to seven. Asa is still dancing, oblivious to the seriousness of what just happened. And as for me, you have no idea of the amount of paperwork I must fill out now explaining why I couldn’t complete my neighborhood patrol duties!