Dear Mom and Dad, take a seat.  We need to have an important discussion.  Please stop calling Asa and me embarrassing nicknames when we are out in public!  We are grown dogs now with responsibilities and a reputation to maintain.  We even have our own blog!  So please resist the urge to call me “Chuckles” and even the far more dreaded “Chuckle Bum” while we are out on adventures!  Also “Asa Bear” and “Asa Poo” are officially off limits too.  I can guarantee Christopher Columbus’ Mom never called him “Chrissy Poo,” when he was navigating the oceans.  Also not a single book refers to Lewis and Clark as “Louie Bum” and “Clarkie Bear” when they were mapping the wild west.  Please show us the respect we deserve as great explorers!

If you do feel the need to use a name other than Chuck Billy, some acceptable options are “CB” or perhaps even my formal name of “Charles William.”  Ok, so that last one will make me think I did something horribly wrong, because that’s the only time you use it now.  But to be honest, it would nice to hear it in a positive tone from time to time.  As for Asa, an acceptable alternative is “Ace.”  Although personally, you have my full permission to call him “Pudding Head” to match his goofy public persona.

Whatever you do decide, we absolutely must insist that you stop calling us “Chuck Asa!”  Sure it covers all the bases when one of us is misbehaving.  But we’re not some sort of conjoined celebrity couple!  William Shakespeare once pondered, “What’s in a name?  That which we call a Rose by any other name would smell as sweet.”  Well I have an answer for old Billy Shakespeare, it may smell the same, but it sure is embarrassing being called Rosie Poo!

Thank you Mom and Dad for listening, now let’s go play fetch.