I was heckled by a hen! While trying to do a good deed, no less! Thankfully Asa was at home with Mom, because he would have made light of this serious situation with a series of jokes. Yesterday while on a routine neighborhood patrol, I noticed a chicken by the side of the road. Now everyone knows chickens are notorious for crossing the road. So I wanted to make sure she knew to look both ways before crossing.
As I approached with my patrol partner, Dad, to give her my advice, her fellow feathered friends all scattered back to the safety of their yard. But not this chicken! Not only did she move closer to the edge of the road, she looked right at me, squared off, began scratching at the ground, and clucked at me! I froze in my tracks at such defiant behavior. I’m your friendly neighborhood patrol dog!
Just then a neighbor drove by between me and the brazen bird. He shouted something from the window about that being one brave chicken and a fresh breakfast for me. Brave? That’s one foolhardy chicken! Sure chickens have been crossing the road for ages, and to some I may sound like the alarmist Chicken Little, but she could have got hurt. During my years of patrolling this street, I’ve seen many squirrel casualties on this road, and I didn’t want to add to it with the first chicken. And I had good reason to be concerned! Just the other day while on patrol, Asa spotted her on the other side of the road in a ditch. She then ran right in front of him into the road without even pausing!
I braced myself, hoping the chicken didn’t cross during the distraction of the car. Thankfully as he drove past, the hen remained in her spot. She clucked a few more heckles at me, and then proceeded to walk back into the safety of her yard. Not the fast run of a typical chicken when confronted, but a slow and deliberate walk that almost looked like she was strutting away! How rude! Does she not appreciate how hard I work keeping everyone safe while on neighborhood patrol?
Sorry for the bad angle of the crime scene photo. Mom was not with us, and Dad is a rookie at evidence collecting for my incident reports. It was taken after the situation was defused, as the chicken walked away.
Although now that I’m home, and examining the photo closer, is that a UFO beam that the chicken is walking towards?
Perhaps I underestimated this chicken? Maybe this has something to do with that Birds Aren’t Real Theory? While I was distracted by the chicken, was there a UFO hovering overhead? Excuse me, I need to think this over more.
