Did you know earlier this week was Cow Appreciation Day? I’m way overdue in letting the Cows, who lived on our street, know how much I appreciated them. So late, in fact, they’ve left the neighborhood months ago! I truly do miss them. They were a huge part of our routine, and yet like most […]
My neighborhood patrol job is inherently dangerous. In my six years of performing my duties day in and day out, I’ve seen a lot. I’ve saved a dog from getting hit by a car, I’ve been stalked by coyotes along the wood line, I’ve been stared down by a bull, and I’ve even had to […]
Our missing Pink Flamingo came home! His reappearance is just as mysterious as his disappearance. Mom came home the other day and there he is back with his flock on the dirt pile! She is positive he wasn’t there that morning, because ever since he went missing Mom would start each day by checking on […]
I’d like to thank you for attending today’s press conference regarding the nationwide search for our missing Pink Flamingo. I’m Detective Chuck Billy and this is my partner Det. Asa. Our beloved lawn ornament went missing exactly one week ago sometime between 5:00 PM on Thursday and 2:00 PM on Friday. At that time the […]
Neighborhood Patrol just got a whole lot better for Asa and me. A dog treat truck visits us! It’s just like the ice cream truck that brings treats for humans, except this one is for dogs only! Ok, so perhaps it isn’t exactly like the ice cream truck. Our truck is driven by a local […]
In the neighborhood criminal justice system, kidnapping of lawn ornaments is considered an especially heinous crime. The worst criminal offenders are pursued by an elite team of dedicated detectives, Chuck Billy and Asa. Here is their story. It all started on Friday afternoon when Mom noticed one of our Pink Flamingos was missing. Visibly upset, she […]
As you know, I take my neighborhood patrol duties very serious. Therefore it should come as no surprise that I’m prepared for anything and always ready to lend a helping paw. However, this most recent event is proving to be quite a challenge, and I may need your help. Do you know this Fish? Recently […]
I’ve been patrolling this neighborhood every morning for five years now, and I thought for certain that I’ve seen everything. Yet this morning I was reminded the world is still full of surprises! Our walk started out natural enough. Perhaps a bit too natural for some people’s sensibilities. I pooped. Since we only made it […]
I will walk 3,000 miles…No seriously, I will! At least according to Dad’s math I will. While on a neighborhood walk the other day the sole of Dad’s sneaker completely came off. We were of course at the farthest point away from our home when it happened. Oh and I should mention it was raining […]
We just witnessed a murder and an innocent dog framed for it! What do we do?! Oh sure I boast about keeping our neighborhood safe while on patrol. But I never imagined a murder could happen on our quiet street, much less right outside our window! Oh the dogmanity! Ok, I’ve got to calm down […]
